Assisi

Nothing ever went wrong

I’m cursing at my google maps navigation. I cannot believe I’m supposed to be driving here with a car.

But wow, what a beautiful place!

Somehow I ended up in very narrow streets between buildings that seem straight from the Middle Ages.

I figure I’m too far in to turn back now. And there wouldn’t be any space for turning anyway. So I’ll just keep going and enjoy the view. 

And try not to hit anything.
Or anyone…

Finally I find a parking place that seems legal enough. I really want to get out and feel this place.

On my way to a new hotel I sort of accidentally ended up in Assisi.

I remembered the city name from one of Kuthumi’s lifetimes: as Saint Francis of Assisi. 

I didn’t care much for that lifetime. I don’t care much for religion at all. But, being here feels surprisingly good.

It’s a gorgeous place and there’s a lightness and joy in the air.

Not really what I’d expected from a Middle Age place with such a strong link to religion.

The big basilisk of Saint Fransesco is pulling me. So I walk over there.

“Ok, cool. Big church. I’ve seen it. Let’s go to the hotel.”

Now we go inside

I can feel some rebellious human part:

“I’m not going inside a stupid church!”

I love following the subtle nudges and pulls from the flow of the soul.

Sometimes as wild or playful adventures. Sometimes with the human-mind pretending to protest a little. I guess it entertains me.

We already know I’m gonna do it anyway.

“Allright, we’re going inside the church…”

I have to admit it’s not totally stupid inside. It’s actually quite lovely and weirdly light. 

A sign says ‘tomb’ and I’m drawn to follow it.

Now I’m in the basement of a church. It’s a weird day.

Oh shit, Saint Francis himself has his tomb here! That’s kinda cool.

I’m looking at the tomb and wonder if there are actual human bones in there somewhere. I take a seat and have a little chat with my friend Kuthumi:

Me: “You know this is a weird journey I'm on. I seem to end up at a lot of your dead human bodies...”

Earlier in Egypt, I was drawn to visit his Tomb from his lifetime as Tutmoses III. And now three months later I’ve found Saint Francis.

We giggle a bit.

K: You know it was never about rules, or religion the way you see it now. The lifetime of Saint Francis.

Me: “I have to admit that I just feel so much joy and lightness here”

K: It was about the joy of divine love.

Me: “Hmm, divine SELF love… Ok.. I can get into that.”

I’m once again reminded of my recent realisation that nothing is wrong.

Nothing ever was wrong.

You cannot do it wrong.

It sounds so simple and I must have heard it a million times. Yet only recently it really hit me.

I thought I already knew it. But turns out often there would be some part of me thinking that some ways would be better than others. Some choices good, other choices bad.

Or criticising any way. Faintly, in the background.

I could say the words: There’s nothing wrong. But it took me this long to actually, deeply believe and experience it.

Ah silly humans
The words we speak
And the things we truly believe
How rarely they align

I can feel parts of me stirring a bit in the background.

Other human expressions in different timelines that resent religion. Strongly resent religion. What had become of it. What happened to the story of Yeshua.

No wonder churches had always made me feel a bit rebellious.

I take a deep breath and smile. Radiating my compassion to them.

Nothing went wrong.
There was nothing wrong.
It never truly happened
Time to stop fighting.
Time to come home.

And time for me to go. This was a lovely little surprise visit, but I’ve had enough of people around me for today.

Time to find my hotel. For real this time.

My pigeon friend in Assisi